The Dord of Darien

Musings from the Mayor of the Internet

This just in: More Bigfoot!

No, he’s not in Florida or Pennsylvania. He’s actually in Georgia, but he’s dead. One might think that perhaps this is the old Florida Bigfoot just crossing state lines, but no; the Florida Bigfoot was a little thing that ate your doughnuts, and this is a giant, seven-and-one-half-foot-tall, quarter-ton rampaging man-ape. Except that it’s dead. And bears a striking resemblance to a Bigfoot costume in a box.

What could go wrong? Sure, the guy promoting this has promoted a Bigfoot hoax before, but that doesn’t prove anything. Maybe this time he’s not lying! I’m sure it’s the real Bigfoot, because they’ve branded the photograph "Bigfoot Global LLC." I’m pretty sure that means they’re serious Bigfoot hunters.

August 15th, 2008 Posted by | Bullshit | 3 comments


  1. It’s pretty clear this is a real Bigfoot, because they have pictures and claim that SCIENTISTS are examining the corpse. And there’s totally not a video on YouTube where one of them admits it’s a hoax.

    Wait there is? …crap

    Comment by Dave | 15 August 2008


    That’s like not smelling what The Rock is cooking. It’s just not allowed.

    Comment by Darien | 15 August 2008

  3. It’s a little-known fact that Bigfeet shed like snakes, and have rubberlike skin.

    Comment by Nyperold | 24 August 2008

Leave a comment

You must be logged in to post a comment.