The Dord of Darien

Musings from the Mayor of the Internet

There’s Portal 2 DLC coming

But you already knew that because you’re not stupid, right? Here’s a guy announcing the pre-announcement announcement, complete with this line:

Hopefully we will see stuff that was cut from Portal 2 that was shown in the game before its release such as the Pneumatic Tubes.

Maybe rent some punctuation next time there, fella. Anyhow, as usual, it’s up to Darien to inject some non-stupid into this conversation. Dear Valve: if I am paying you $10 for another eight test chambers or whatever, I would prefer to get stuff that wasn’t cut from Portal 2 due to being not fun. I mean, really, dude; what are you thinking? Valve doesn’t want the game to exceed its regulated fun quota, so they take out some really awesome stuff to make it less fun? That’s what you think game design is like?

Man, really. This stuff was cut from Portal 2 for one of two reasons: either it didn’t work right or it wasn’t fun. Since we have videos of the pneumatic diversity vents, we know they worked. So clearly they weren’t fun. And you know what? I’ve seen the video myself, and they sure don’t look like they’re any fun. I mean, they look like they’d be neat to play with right at first, but that there’s exactly zero play depth there. I think everything that’s fun about the pneumatic diversity vents (other than the name, to be sure) already got into Portal 2 in… a slightly altered form. And that’s all I’ll say about that, so no calling spoiler on me.

April 28th, 2011 Posted by | Games | no comments

You mean an itinerant mender of pots and pans?