Idjits
Some of my guild-mates went on a PUG of heroic Naxx the other day. I wisely sat out; I was at work anyhow, but you can be damn sure I’d have had a cold or a dentist’s appointment or been hit by a car or some damn thing so I could skip that. I’ve done my share of PUGs, and they are not fun. So I figured this would be hours of pure human misery and probably not get much accomplished anyhow.
Actually, it didn’t go as well as I expected. They wiped a few times on Grand Widow Faerlina, since their brilliant plan was to kill all the adds first and then focus on Faerlina, thereby eliminating their ability to use Widow’s Embrace to negate the frenzy and poison bolts, and gaining them… well, not actually a goddamn thing in return. But the best was yet to come!
Their strategy for Patchwerk involved all the DPS standing in the slime and not getting healed so their health would stay low and they wouldn’t take Hateful Strikes. Here are a few problems with that:
1) The slime reduces all stats — not just health, but all stats — by 75%. Patchwerk is a big dumb DPS race, and there’s no goddamn way you can get him down in six minutes with your DPS completely gimped by the slime debuff.
2) That, of course, presupposes that you’ll have any living DPS at all, and since the slime also puts up a meaningful DOT, you’re not likely to. Remember that bit about not healing the DPS? Yeah. That meant they were all dead a few seconds into the fight.
3) There’s no fucking reason in creation to put people in the slime anyhow. That’s so stupid and so senseless that I knew it was wrong without actually knowing anything about the mechanics of the fight, and it’s so pervasive that the Wowwiki article includes specific mention of it and what idiots people who think that are.
They wiped on Patchwerk many, many times and could not figure out the problem.
If this is too nerdy for you and you have no idea what any of this is about, feel free to pretend it was a bunch of dick jokes about Gary Sheffield, and they were really funny.
Haha. I never get tired of dick jokes about Gary Sheffield.
Comment by Dave | 3 June 2009